Friday, November 12, 2004
yesterday was sec 3 grace class gathering and it was a blast! i had so much fun playing cards, playing majhong (is that how u spell it?) - yes, that noisy but somewhat fun game! - watching singapore idol (taufik!), bbq-ing, eating loads of junk food... i really did not want to leave after that but oh well, all good things must come to an end. left at 9.30 with pipi and yanjun. jun was taking pictures of us and at the same time checking the photos for any weird lights i.e. ghosts. haha.
to make things even better, we (bella, jas, yanhan, cleo n i) cleared the ld room today and it was a huge success! the ld room's now err... half cleared. we're gonna go through the cupboards soon. but still, the ld room's tons neater n cleaner. we're gonna have a new rule, no one can go into the ld room without me or geraldine with them. that way we can make sure that everything is put back properly!
it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles... the credit belongs to the man who is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who coms short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds... who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of hihg achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timad souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
i've felt that i've been defeated all the time this year. i dunno why but this year has been especially rough for me. i cry over the smallest things. i feel defeated in everything, my academics, ld...
my marks this year have been nothing to be proud of. i guess i just can't stomach the fact that everyone else is smarter than me and that i can't seem to do well in at least one subject. i can tell my parents are worried, especially when my sister'sgetting straight As. it's fustrating the way i don't manage my time well and no matter how many times i tell myself to buck up, i never seem to do it.
i think what gets me down the most this year was not getting into the cast for our perth production. ok maybe it was a big reality check for me that i'm not meant to be on stage and yes, i enjoyed myself thoroughly working with sound but the days when i just sat there watching the others rehearse on stage while i did absolutely nothing still linger in my mind. i hated it. during times like that i just thought i was never going to be good at anything and i hated mself for it. n it gets even more fustrating when some people in the cast think they're not good enough to be on stage n whine about it all the time. talk about rubbing it in... and i still remember the day natalie yelled at me "that fading was awful!". from then onwards i didn't dare to control the music for that scene, i let martina do it.
because of the perth production experience i didn't dare audition for syf because i know i would not get in. now i hate myself for it cos loads of people felt they would not get in but they were still brave enough and went ahead with the auditions. tiffy if u're reading this i just want you to know that i understand what you're going through and i also wanna thank you for everthing you've done for me. it was fun running through the rain!
of cos in times like these i entirely grateful for people like those in the perth production (pet, char, daph, weng, rah, cris, jean, glady, yilin, bella, cleo, yingqing, mandy, martina), yanhan, tiffy, pipi, yanjun, qiu n vinca. bella for always cheering me up and encouraging me n of cos helping me with the ld rm. the same goes to yanhan n tiffy. tffy i know i always seem to be drowning myself in self pity but i'm just letting go of all my fustrations. thanks for bearing with me and comforting me. n pipi, qiu, yanjun and vinca for always making me laugh and being there for me. even though i still find it hard to communicate with u guys cos u guys are speaking in chinese and i don't always know what you're talking about. but still, i love u guys.
ok all this is just the downside of 2004, there were plenty of good things that happened too like being in perth with some of the greatest people but i just wanted to get the negative stuff off my chest. i feel better now.
You were mine my boo
Now another brother's taking over
But its still in your eyes my boo
Even though we used to argue it's alright
I know we haven't seen each other
In awhile but you will always be my boo
I was in love with you when we were younger
You were mine my boo
And I see it from time to time
I still feel like my boo
And I can see it no matter
How I try to hide my boo
Even though there's another man in my life
You will always be my boo
yesterday was sec 3 grace class gathering and it was a blast! i had so much fun playing cards, playing majhong (is that how u spell it?) - yes, that noisy but somewhat fun game! - watching singapore idol (taufik!), bbq-ing, eating loads of junk food... i really did not want to leave after that but oh well, all good things must come to an end. left at 9.30 with pipi and yanjun. jun was taking pictures of us and at the same time checking the photos for any weird lights i.e. ghosts. haha.
to make things even better, we (bella, jas, yanhan, cleo n i) cleared the ld room today and it was a huge success! the ld room's now err... half cleared. we're gonna go through the cupboards soon. but still, the ld room's tons neater n cleaner. we're gonna have a new rule, no one can go into the ld room without me or geraldine with them. that way we can make sure that everything is put back properly!
watchin u;
at 8:15 PM
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles... the credit belongs to the man who is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who coms short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds... who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of hihg achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timad souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
i've felt that i've been defeated all the time this year. i dunno why but this year has been especially rough for me. i cry over the smallest things. i feel defeated in everything, my academics, ld...
my marks this year have been nothing to be proud of. i guess i just can't stomach the fact that everyone else is smarter than me and that i can't seem to do well in at least one subject. i can tell my parents are worried, especially when my sister'sgetting straight As. it's fustrating the way i don't manage my time well and no matter how many times i tell myself to buck up, i never seem to do it.
i think what gets me down the most this year was not getting into the cast for our perth production. ok maybe it was a big reality check for me that i'm not meant to be on stage and yes, i enjoyed myself thoroughly working with sound but the days when i just sat there watching the others rehearse on stage while i did absolutely nothing still linger in my mind. i hated it. during times like that i just thought i was never going to be good at anything and i hated mself for it. n it gets even more fustrating when some people in the cast think they're not good enough to be on stage n whine about it all the time. talk about rubbing it in... and i still remember the day natalie yelled at me "that fading was awful!". from then onwards i didn't dare to control the music for that scene, i let martina do it.
because of the perth production experience i didn't dare audition for syf because i know i would not get in. now i hate myself for it cos loads of people felt they would not get in but they were still brave enough and went ahead with the auditions. tiffy if u're reading this i just want you to know that i understand what you're going through and i also wanna thank you for everthing you've done for me. it was fun running through the rain!
of cos in times like these i entirely grateful for people like those in the perth production (pet, char, daph, weng, rah, cris, jean, glady, yilin, bella, cleo, yingqing, mandy, martina), yanhan, tiffy, pipi, yanjun, qiu n vinca. bella for always cheering me up and encouraging me n of cos helping me with the ld rm. the same goes to yanhan n tiffy. tffy i know i always seem to be drowning myself in self pity but i'm just letting go of all my fustrations. thanks for bearing with me and comforting me. n pipi, qiu, yanjun and vinca for always making me laugh and being there for me. even though i still find it hard to communicate with u guys cos u guys are speaking in chinese and i don't always know what you're talking about. but still, i love u guys.
ok all this is just the downside of 2004, there were plenty of good things that happened too like being in perth with some of the greatest people but i just wanted to get the negative stuff off my chest. i feel better now.
watchin u;
at 11:58 AM
Monday, November 08, 2004
You were mine my boo
Now another brother's taking over
But its still in your eyes my boo
Even though we used to argue it's alright
I know we haven't seen each other
In awhile but you will always be my boo
I was in love with you when we were younger
You were mine my boo
And I see it from time to time
I still feel like my boo
And I can see it no matter
How I try to hide my boo
Even though there's another man in my life
You will always be my boo
watchin u;
at 5:31 AM